Humility: Freedom From Pride or Arrogance

Hello friends,

I wish that I had some fun pictures to show you, some fabulous adventure to share, or some insightful words, but the truth is, I just haven't had much to write about for a while. To give a quick update:

Mark is still enjoying his job as an Aerospace Ground Equipment Mechanic for the Air Force. He is currently working nights, which has been an adjustment, but that doesn't bother him too much. Right now, he's studying hard to complete his training and testing for advancement. This past quarter, he got a 100% on his physical training test and made it into the top 10 percentile of the Air Force. I am very proud of him! I have been very busy with work and school. I decided to go back to college this last fall, and as a result of the overwhelming grace and generosity of Mr. and Mrs. Robert Davis, I am able to do so without incurring any student loans! God has provided for me a great deal through them. I couldn't be more grateful.

As some of you know, the last couple of months have been somewhat difficult for me. Being myself, I've been desperately trying to pinpoint a reason as to why I'm feeling down so that I can fix it right away. I don't like negativity or apathy, and those are two emotions that I have been experiencing a lot recently. I have always prided myself in being one who is not afraid of change, new things, or difficulties. I like to believe that I have something offer - an example, a word of advice, some encouragement, something... But lately, I have been all dried up. When the opportunity arises, I have nothing to say. I have nothing to show, nothing to offer.

This afternoon, I think that God gave me a glimpse of what he is doing inside my heart. And it seems that perhaps he is showing me what it means to be humble. In the same way that the body releases toxins during a cleanse (you can imagine how gross that is), I've encountered only a few ways thus far that he's cleansing me from my nasty pride. These things have been very difficult to face. How annoying! So, with a bit of frustration, I looked up the word humility in the dictionary. It reads, "Humility - freedom from pride or arrogance." Well now, that's not so bad. I like freedom. I sure wish it could come at a smaller price though.

In the words of my cousin-in-law (is that a word?) Sarah Finkenbinder, "Each time I wander, I come back to Him because I know that I am nothing and have nothing without Him. God is Jehovah Shammah. He is there. God is Jehovah Jireh. He provides. God is Jehovah Shalom. He is my peace... I must say, it is well with my soul."

Thank you for your ears (or eyes) in listening to my heart,

Laura